💬 “Marriage Is an Option” — A Simple Line, a Heavy Truth
One candid remark from BTS leader RM has sparked intense conversation among 90s-born adults and today’s youth: “결혼은 옵션, 그냥 쪼대로 살았으면 좋겠다” (“Marriage is optional, I hope people just live the way they want”). Far from a throwaway joke, his words reflected the emotional reality of a generation navigating economic pressure, changing norms, and evolving ideas of happiness. Coming from a global idol and public figure, the statement felt less like a slogan and more like a rare, honest acknowledgment.
🧍 “If You Can Be Alone, You Can Truly Be Together”
RM opened up about how he views relationships and marriage, asking a deceptively simple question: “If you can’t stand being alone, is marriage really the answer?” His point wasn’t to dismiss marriage, but to question why we choose it. He suggested that partnership should come after a sense of self is formed, not as a cure for loneliness. This resonates deeply with younger generations who value emotional independence and self-knowledge as the foundation for any long-term relationship.
📅 The First Generation That Truly Sees Marriage as an Option
RM also pointed out that those born in the 1990s are among the first in Korea to see marriage as a real choice, not a default path. In a society where family, marriage, and children have long been treated as milestones everyone must eventually reach, his words felt like permission to step off the conveyor belt. For many, it was empowering to hear a public figure say out loud: “You’re allowed to choose differently.”
⚖️ Naming the Pressure: Marriage, Childbirth, and Social Expectations
RM didn’t stop at individual choice. He also acknowledged how social and media pressure, especially on women, shapes the conversation around marriage and childbirth. By framing it as a structural issue rather than just a personal decision, he spoke for countless young people who feel weighed down by expectations they never agreed to. His sensitivity to gendered pressure made his remarks feel thoughtful, not reckless.
📚 RM’s One-Liners That Sound Like Life Philosophy
| Quote | Meaning | Typical Reaction |
|---|---|---|
| “결혼은 옵션, 쪼대로 살자” (Marriage is an option, live your own way) |
We don’t have to follow a preset life script; personal choice comes first. | “So real.” “This is exactly how I feel.” |
| “인생은 스프고 나는 포크다” (Life is soup and I’m a fork) |
Playful metaphor for how confusing and ill-fitting life can feel. | “Philosopher vibes.” “It’s funny but deep.” |
| “혼자 있을 수 있어야 함께도 잘 살 수 있다” | True relationships begin when you’re okay alone. | “This is a real quote to live by.” |
🧠 RM’s Mind: Not Just Fluent, but Deeply Thoughtful
As BTS’s leader, RM is known for much more than his rap skills. He’s recognized for his language ability, introspection, and intellectual curiosity. From writing his own UN speech to leading interviews at the White House, he consistently shows that his strength isn’t just “speaking well,” but thinking deeply and expressing clearly. His now-famous comments on marriage fit into a long pattern of him voicing questions many are afraid to ask out loud.
📈 RM’s Language and Thought in a Snapshot
| Area | Details |
|---|---|
| English Learning | Self-taught through endless rewatching of Friends with Korean subs → English subs → no subs. |
| Public Communication | UN address, White House visit, global award shows and interviews. |
| Core Strength | Not just fluency, but clear personal philosophy behind his words. |
🗣 From “Good Speaker” to “Someone Who Speaks His Mind”
RM’s appeal goes beyond polished English or charismatic delivery. What sets him apart is that he consistently asks: “What do I truly think, and what is worth saying?” His comments on marriage, loneliness, and choice reflect a pattern — he doesn’t chase safe answers; he chooses honest ones. That’s why his words stick. They don’t sound like PR lines; they sound like late-night conversations with a friend who isn’t afraid to be real.
🔑 A New Question About Marriage: Who Owns Your Life?
RM’s statement matters not simply because a famous person said it, but because it challenges a deeply rooted social script. In a culture where marriage and childbirth are still described as life “duties,” he suggests that your life is yours first. His stance doesn’t attack marriage — it reframes it as one of many possible paths, not the only valid destination. For many young people, that distinction is liberating.
📚 Related Reads
- How BTS Redefined K-pop’s Narrative with Authentic Storytelling
- RM’s SFMOMA Curator Debut: When a K-pop Leader Meets Modern Art
- BTS V at Paris Fashion Week: From K-Star to Global Fashion Icon
❓ FAQ: RM’s “Marriage Is an Option” Remark
1. What did RM mean by “marriage is an option”?
He emphasized that marriage should be a choice, not an obligation, and that people are free to live according to their own values and timing.
2. Why did his comment resonate so strongly with 90s-born Koreans?
Many 90s-born adults are the first generation in Korea to truly see marriage as optional amid economic strain and shifting values, so his words reflected their lived reality.
3. Was RM criticizing marriage itself?
No. He wasn’t attacking marriage, but questioning social pressure around it and suggesting that personal readiness matters more than expectation.
4. Why did people describe his remark as “courageous”?
Because marriage, childbirth, and family are still sensitive topics in Korea, especially for public figures. Speaking honestly about them requires risk and conviction.
5. How does this fit into RM’s overall image?
It aligns with his long-standing image as a thoughtful leader who values self-reflection, autonomy, and honest conversation over safe, scripted answers.
✨ Conclusion
RM’s “marriage is an option” message isn’t about rejecting tradition — it’s about reclaiming ownership of one’s life. In a world that often hands out a predetermined script, his words invite a different path: know yourself first, choose your own timing, and live “쪼대로” — in your own way.